We are black...We are Proud!

Miss Universe 2019:

Zozibini Tunzi

Miss Universe Ireland 2019:

Fionnghuala O'Reilly

Miss Universe Iceland 2019:

Birta Abiba Þórhallsdóttir

Miss Supranational USA 2019:

Regina Gray

Miss USA 2019:

Cheslie Kryst

Miss United States 2019:

Alexia Robinson

Miss Teen USA 2019:

Kaliegh Garris

Miss Earth Air 2019:

Emanii Davis

Do these names sound familiar to you??? These are just a few of the black beauties that have lent a hand in creating history and carving a path for the rest of us. These past few weeks we have seen many different sides of people regarding what we look like and how God has made us. I've heard many ignorant remarks, but the one that stuck with me the most came in a post where someone asks why we chose to live this way (regarding the color of our skin). I wanted to take this time to write out and share a small part of my story and how I have been learning to love, accept and break down the walls of being a strong woman of color. Because we may not have chosen to live this way, but I am proud God made me this way.

When I was younger, I had trouble fully accepting the color of my skin. I have lives in a predominantly white area my entire life. It was difficult to find a place where I was fully comfortable and not comparing myself to those around me. For most of my life, a majority of my friends have been white. I never really had a problem with it until I hit third grade, when someone I thought was my friend decided that it was ok to call me a slave. (So much for child innocence) I didn't know what she meant by it, but I knew it hurt. It's not like I was going around working for her, but I knew that it was wrong for her to even think about using that term after calling me her best friend.

In fourth grade, I was separated from my friends in class and was put with a lot of new kids. I instantly made new friends, and this time they looked like me. When it first happened, I didn't notice that we were a group of black girls and one day a kid from one of the other classes told me that I should go hang out with "them". I didn't really understand it at that time, but soon after I put my glasses on and viewed what they were saying. They were talking about the color of my skin. At this point I was only 9-10 years old and was being judged by my peers based on what I look like. I felt confused and wasn't sure of myself. Constant voices in my head saying, "God doesn't love me because if he did he would've made you white". Soon after these same "friends" told me that I wasn't black enough.

At this point, I had already been doing pageants for a few years, but as this continued so did my open eyes to the lack of colored women being represented within the pageant community. I was scared to show my natural hair (so much so, that I ended up frying it with a straightener almost everyday before school for four years). I was scared to show the real me for so long that I started to forget who I was.

These queens and all of the black beauties that came before them remind me daily that anything is possible. We can overcome who we are viewed as because of who we are. The color of our skin matters. It has teared us down, but together we have brought each other back up to break the walls that people have tried to surround us with. Year after year, week after week, and day after day people of color all around the world face the challenges that a white person will never understand.We know that not all cops are bad, but those who stand with the system make it worse by the second. We need this change, because this change will save lives and maybe one day we can feel a little bit more safe in the country that has "All men are created equal" in their history.

I told this story, because I want people to realize that racism can happen in all forms. I am devastated by the events that have occurred over the past couple of weeks. And I honestly have no words but Ido have questions.

~Why is it unfair for us to protest about protecting our lives when you thought it was appropriate to protest about getting a hair cut or getting your nails done?

~Do you think it's fair that every time I go outside of my house, I get strange looks from people around because I may not look like the stereotypical black girl?

~Why are you scared when you see the color of my skin?

These are just a few of the things that run through my mind during this time. What's running through yours? I genuinely want to know, because I (along with plenty of others) want to know and understand. We've said our piece, give us yours!